Sunday, August 9, 2015

Tenth Date Kiss


I met someone.  I randomly received a message from this guy on Match.com and I was simply intrigued by what he wrote on his profile page.  After about a day and a half of messaging one another on the dating site we decided to exchange numbers.  Our very first phone conversation wasn't awkward how most first phone conversations can be, but easy flowing and comfortable.  Two days after our initial talk we were on the phone at 5:00 am one Saturday morning and we talked for about an hour when he made the suggestion that we finally meet and get some breakfast.  I agreed and we met at IHOP for the first time.

After breakfast we walked around a little just talking not ready to leave one another yet and he grabs my hand which was odd because usually I'm the one initiating this type of affection.  Finally, the time came when we had to depart and he goes in to kiss me, but I pull back so we just hug.  Almost within minutes of being apart he texted me saying that he was going in for a kiss and I said that maybe he would get one on our second date.  I had no idea that our second date would be the same day as our first.

We met up a few hours later because we were both very eager to be around one another.  The more we talked the more I started to realize that he is everything that I was waiting for a man to be.  He has a relationship with and boldness in Jesus Christ that I admire, smart, good looking, ambitious, determined and so much more.  It was a joy talking to him about our same shared beliefs and values which made forging a friendship all the more easier.  He is a couple years younger than me so it was refreshing that he wants the same future as me which is to get married one day not just wham bam thank you ma'am, but the serious pursuit of a relationship.

On our second date he reminded me that I said that he might get a kiss and indeed this was our second date, but I jokingly said to him that he wouldn't get a kiss until our tenth date and he actually agreed that we should wait. 

Long story short we started dating.  We would text each other almost all day until we could see each other in the evening.  I kept track of the number of dates because this was so unique to me and I reveled in it.  This situation felt mature, proper and like we were working towards more then dating, but a friendship and possibly love.  As the dates passed I started to become anxious to kiss him and he felt the same, but we stuck to the agreement.

The tenth date finally rolls around probably within a week and a half of when we first met and he really went out of his way to make it feel special for us.  He bought me flowers, roses to be exact and we went to the National Harbor.  It was straight out of a fairy tale how everything fell in place.  We went on the Ferris Wheel and after a couple rotations of the wheel and enjoying the scenery from above we finally did it, we kissed.  I wish I could remember the song that was playing during our kiss, but the kiss itself was better than what I expected it to be.  I knew it would be good, but wow.  It felt loving and passionate.

This is "the one" I'm so sure of it.  In such a short time we were encouraging one another, having serious conversations about life and becoming overall best friends.  It felt like a special connection.  We had a few bumps which is normal because we were getting to know one another.  I would find myself missing him when we weren't together and he missed me as well.

The day after our amazing first kiss we were talking on the phone before I went to bed and all of a sudden the conversation started going downhill.  We had a falling out and he said he was done and hung up on me.  When we would previously have a little disagreement he would text me in the morning and we would eventually reconcile.  This was the first time he had ever hung up on me.  There was no morning text and I didn't hear from him until later in the afternoon that day.  He texted me basically stating that we were going to be friends, but not pursuing a relationship.  I didn't reply.  Got a phone call from him later that night and I ignored it.  He has since been texting and calling me here and there apologizing for his actions and saying that he wants me back and that he will treat me better, but I haven't responded.  I will respond eventually, but I am not ready yet.  It hurt and I have a lot of concerns.

I'm not mad at him and I forgive him for his actions.  Hanging up on me was disrespectful and I saw this as a teachable moment for him.  This has not discouraged me in my quest for love, but in fact energized me.  I feel grateful and blessed that I went through this experience because people tell me that wanting a fairy tale romance is rubbish, but I know now that they are wrong.  The type of man that I want is out there and this guy was proof.  As for this man that waited ten dates just to kiss me I pray that he finds the woman that he desires and will bring him happiness.  That woman was not me and I am cool with that.

Thanks for reading!
(John 3:16)

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